Unwelcome by Rupert Loydell

I allude to myself in the landscape,
allow myself the luxury of hope,
recall singing these songs to you
as a child, visiting these places
when you were small. We shared
jokes, made cardboard houses,
still shared common ground

before you became older
and I unwelcome. I have
torn up the map, pasted it
into new paintings and let
reference numbers, grid,
hills and trees and roads
become a sort of pattern

under layers of colour.
I have to talk myself back
into being calm, am working
through panic and unrest,
trying to remember when
we were both carefree
and easier to live with.

Rupert Loydell

Rupert Loydell is a Senior Lecturer at Falmouth University, a poet, editor and artist. He has run Stride magazine since 1982 and is a contributing editor to International Times. Shearsman recently published Dear Mary, a book of poems about art, colour, annunication and Italy.

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