Putting Them On by Shadwell Smith

The celebrity banana chimp man
puts napkins on his balls
eats his weight in peanuts
and frequently subscribes
to hotel shower girls

but he’s an artist
who wears his clothes
and shows us how to give.
He visits children’s wards at Christmas.
He has integrity.
Everyone knows that.

When the celebrity banana chimp man
says cheeese
he trends on social media.
Get him in your picture.
Tell your friends.
You’ve got traffic
when he puts his hand around your arse.

Shadwell is a school teacher who lives in Dunstable. His poems have appeared in a number of magazines and e-zines. He sometimes appears in pubs, clubs and coffee shops performing them.