At 4AM I Awake And I’m Sure Of This by Laura McKee

It doesn’t matter
It matters more than anything
I should let it go
I should hold on for dear life
I’m meant to be a housewife
I’m meant to be a mother
I’m meant to be a mother you’d like to fuck
Thank God for gut instinct
Thank the devil for spontaneous lust
Just fuck it
Just fuck you
Just fuck me
I need to be alone
I need to make up my mind
I need to be told
I want you to go away
I want you to go to her
I want you to come here to my place
I need you to put me in my place
I need tea
I need coffee
I need to hear music
I need my earphones
I need to hear you growl in my ear
I need chocolate
I’m going to make tea
I’m going to make coffee
I’m going to make you moan
This is dumb
This is everything
This is nothing at all
I need my dressing gown
I need my slippers
I need ibuprofen
I need to home educate
I need to taste you
I need to touch up the paint there on that wall
I need you to touch me up there on that wall
We should wait for the paint to dry
It doesn’t matter

Laura Mckee

Laura McKee has had poems in various journals, including Other Poetry, Prole, Neon, The Lake, Ink Sweat & Tears, The Journal, Morphrog. This year she had a poem nominated for Best Single Poem in the Forward Prizes, and will have a poem on a bus at the Guernsey Literary Festival.

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